For many years now we listened to repeatedly on the i HE IMPORTANCE to develop and express the most of our emotional intelligence.
However, we are so saturated with the concept that in the end we just know that there are many skills we need to achieve, but we don’t know if we are going in the right direction or if we should strive just to maintain those skills.
Emotionally intelligent people have a great capacity to manage their feelings and those of others in an appropriate way. The fact that we are emotional beings and, in addition, intelligent, can seem very complicated. However, this depends a lot on how we build our goals.
Everyone, without exception, can light a flame within that will help us control our emotions, set boundaries, and break down unwanted emotional barriers.
That’s why, to make it simpler, we’ve sought, in this article, to talk about the habits that emotionally intelligent people tend to bring into their lives. Be sure to check it out!
1. Emotionally intelligent people know themselves
The people emotionally intelligent are able to understand the causes that lead them to feel one way or another. They properly identify the situation and the source of their feelings, better handling conflicts and difficult times.
This is not an easy task, as our emotional lives can get quite complicated. In fact, locating what causes us strong emotions such as anger, fear, or joy is particularly difficult.
2. Emotionally intelligent people make decisions
These people are also afraid, but they don’t rush to make decisions. Instead, they weigh their options and the consequences of each possible decision.
Having developed emotional intelligence will help us to recognize and take responsibility, thus bringing plans to get what we want in life.
3. Emotionally intelligent people manage their emotions
For Daniel Goleman and other scholars on the subject, self-awareness is one of the pillars of emotional intelligence. This ability consists in knowing how to recognize our moods, emotions and feelings.
Furthermore, self-awareness also implies being aware of how our moods influence people. Managing our emotional resources is a fundamental part of emotional intelligence.
The fact that we regulate our emotions is in tune with establishing healthy relationships, both with others and with ourselves. Being aware of what we feel allows us to govern our emotions, not the other way around.
4. Emotionally intelligent people empathize
Emotions are contagious. We all know this fact from experience. After a good coffee with a friend, you feel good. When a rude receptionist attends you, you feel bad. Daniel Goleman
Empathy, or the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, is another pillar of emotional intelligence. Knowing what others feel makes it easier to relate and manage the different interpersonal situations that may occur.
We can neutralize our senses, but we are not able to escape our own and others’ emotions. In contrast, people who are skilled at controlling emotions control this dimension very well.
5. Emotionally intelligent people open their hearts
Openness and trust in our relationships are essential indicators that we are people with a high degree of emotional intelligence. In other words, opening up and putting aside reservations is beneficial to cement healthy relationships.
Furthermore, being emotionally skilled not only allows us to feel and manage our emotions properly, but also to express and convey them correctly.
6. Emotionally intelligent people are highly motivated to complete their projects
Even though they are nervous, when it comes to making a change in their lives, these people know that managing fear is the key to success. When taking a leap and making the change, they know they can improve their lives and this makes them be one step ahead of achieving their goals.
Also, since they control their emotions properly, they can tolerate high levels of frustration and delay gratification in order to reach their long-term goals.
7. Emotionally intelligent people take responsibility for their lives
Self-acceptance and self-confidence help us to be aware and committed to ourselves. That is, we are responsible for our joys and our frustrations; therefore, the burden of solving our affairs is ours alone, and no one else’s.
How can we improve our emotional intelligence?
There is a zero relationship between IQ and emotional empathy. They are controlled by different parts of the brain. Daniel Goleman.
There is no direct relationship between what we understand by academic intelligence and emotional intelligence. A person can be highly intelligent and excel in high school or college, but not excel in personal matters.
It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence. It is not a triumph of the heart under “the head”, but the intersection of both at the same point.
Thus, in everyday life we can complete different actions to achieve greater knowledge of our emotions:
- Know yourself. Ask yourself questions, question your behaviors, and reflect on your values. Performing daily introspection exercises will mark a before and an after in your emotional self-knowledge.
- Regulate your emotions. Let’s say this isn’t simple either; however, it is worth working to control our emotions, both positive and negative. If you feel yourself getting angry, take your time as soon as possible and step away from the situation for a while. Don’t forget that you are in control of your life and your behaviors and emotions.
- Create empathy with others. Put yourself in the shoes of the people around you, including the ones you like least. That way you will understand that each one has its story, which may help you to better reveal complicated situations.
- Seek your motivation daily. Get up each morning with the dream of moving forward in life. Big achievements are made up of small wins, don’t forget!